Whenever I come to a fork in the road, to make a decision, I make the decision. And if I have to course correct, I will. So then when the big decisions come up in life about business, about marketing, about investing, about marriage, about moving, you can make the decision quickly because you’ve trained your subconscious mind. That’s the secret.
Ben Pakulski: How do you begin to be a thoughtful communicator rather than being adversarial like you say?
Bedros Keuilian: Very good question. The best way to become a thoughtful communicator is to say what is the message that I want to transfer? And then once you know what outcome you want to transfer, I Tell, Show, Do. So if you were, let’s say, a web developer for me, and because I just recently had this conversation. I would say, “Hey Ben, here’s what I want our websites to do.” I would tell you what I want done. And then I would say, “Here’s a website that does something similar that I want it to do,” right? Tell, Show. And then I would say, “Now can you do it by this date?” And then give them a deadline because part of communication is to give the person…
Ben Pakulski: Set expectations.
Bedros Keuilian: …expectations and a deadline. And so we don’t do that, we say, “Hey, can you very quickly make a website that gets the email address and the phone number and puts it in this database?” I said very quickly, you know?
Ben Pakulski: Sure.
Bedros Keuilian: To the web developer, very quickly might be …
Ben Pakulski: Two weeks.
Bedros Keuilian: …six months.
Ben Pakulski: Exactly.
Bedros Keuilian: Right? To you and I, as entrepreneurs, I need it in the next hour.
Ben Pakulski: Yeah, 15 minutes.
Bedros Keuilian: Right. So we have to have the…So it’s Tell, Show, Do. Tell them what you want. Show them what you want it to do. And then ask them to Do it by a deadline.
Ben Pakulski: I want you to talk to me about decisiveness because I know a lot of people are crippled by that. Now, that’s a tough thing to get through your head sometimes. Is it the idea of making a decision no matter what it is and sticking with it? Most people can’t even decide what they want at Starbucks, or what they want at the restaurant. Do you put a time limit on yourself? I know you gave us some strategies at the mastermind, talk about that.
Bedros Keuilian: Yeah, you nailed it, you nailed it. And most people think that they have to make a decision and stick with it. That’s the thing, you don’t.
Ben Pakulski: It’s not going to change your life, right?
Bedros Keuilian: It-
Ben Pakulski: Maybe it will, but…
Bedros Keuilian: There is no one big decision, other than death, that’s going to change your life. Everything else you can bounce back from, and I have to remind people that our former President, Bill Clinton, bounced back from getting a…
Ben Pakulski: Bad decision.
Bedros Keuilian: Making a very bad decision in the oral office, if you know what I mean, right? And so, if he can bounce back from that, we can bounce back from any bad decision short of death. And so people go, how do I make decisions that are so scary, that involve money, that involve business, employees, family, maybe moving across the country. I go, “Before you make the big decisions, let’s teach your subconscious mind that it’s okay to make decisions.” See, the subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between big decisions and small decisions.
Bedros Keuilian: For example, we were going to drive here to this building, to this house. I could have used Uber or Lyft. Just make a decision, Uber it is. I didn’t ask Jonathan there, “Hey, do you want to get the Uber, or should I?” I just did it, right? If you’re going to go on a date with your wife next time, you can either hem and haw, do we get steak or sushi, do you want to go at 7:00 PM or 8:00 PM? Or you just say, “Hey hon, why don’t we get steak at 7:00 PM,” and if she has a different opinion, she’ll tell you.
Ben Pakulski: She’ll tell you.
Bedros Keuilian: So make the smaller decisions fast. For example, do I wear shorts or long pants today? Make a decision. If it’s the wrong decision, you can wear shorts tomorrow, right? But if you start making the smaller decisions quickly without hem and hawing over it, you’re teaching your subconscious mind that whenever I come to a fork in the road to make a decision, I make the decision. And if I have to course correct, I will. So then when the big decisions come up in life about business, about marketing, about investing, about marriage, about moving, you can make the decision quickly because you’ve trained your subconscious mind. That’s the secret.